Abandoned First Love.

"But I have this [one charge to make] against you: that you have left (abandoned) the love that you had at first [you have deserted me, your first love]." - Revelation 2:4

Have you ever been lost in life? I mean so lost! Like you're wondering around with no purpose, no drive, nothing at all. I recall spring 2013 where I was absolutely lost. I was wondering around trying to find purpose, love, and validity in worldly things. I had abandoned my first love. I had TURNED my back on God looking for CONTENTMENT in this world.

As I have began to prepare for this semester of Pinky Promise, I was drafting our first message during my quiet time. As I begin to write, I realized that I was preaching to myself and the Holy Spirit starting calling out areas of my life where I had once pulled away from God's love. I was shocked. Did I really think I could make it in life walking around empty and LEAVING the love that created me and replacing it with temporary MESS? Yes. Yes I did. See I thought that if I could keep myself busy with school I would be fine. I though that wearing the smallest, tightest, most revealing clothes for the attention I would feel better! But the truth is sis, nothing made me feel better. In the middle of party with my outfit on looking and feeling cute, I feel empty on the inside. I was dressed up on the outside and broken on the inside.

 I learned soon after that nothing can replace the love that Christ has for you or me. As far as I ran from God, his love was still constant. You can try and fill it up with randoms, sex, alcohol, and even school, but nothing with ever satisfy you but HIM. All those things eventually end. Stop running. Stop it. He wants you back.

My heart is heavy for my sisters who feel like that don't deserve God's love anymore. The ones who feel like the abortion, the rape, the abuse, the divorce, or something traumatic has separated them from God's love, so they're living in the pain of the past. Life happens sis. But don't let the pain turn you away from God. Stop wondering through life feeling empty and looking for something or someone to fill you up. The truth is sis, that man you think completes you is temporary, that bottle of liquor you're drinking will only last for so long, that high you're feeling will be gone soon. God is saying RETURN TO ME. I love you. I created you. You are fearfully and wonderfully made. You are not a mistake. That abortion, that pain, that emptiness does not define you. Abandon your fear and come back into the arms of love. I love you, allow me to heal you. I won't leave you like these temporary things. 

His ways are perfect girl. HIS LOVE IS THE ONLY LOVE THAT CAN HEAL YOU. Return back to him, sis. Return his arms of love. That will heal and restore you. That tragic event doesn't have to define you anymore. God defines you. Stop listening to the lies of the world and start speaking the word of God over your life. God makes broken things beautiful. His love never fails. 

you. are. loved.

you. are. forgiven.

you. are. beautiful.